Imagine, amidst all the shares of the last week, a new dream. A deeply personal, intimate dream....and while I wrote this of a man, as a cis-gender woman, feel free to add to it as you feel to for you and interchange the gender labels as works for you :-)
It's a dream that I feel many of the men (and the women) witnessing these shares are just beaming the possibility of this at all the women sharing, who have never had the benefit yet of experiencing this kind of dynamic I'm about to share...hoping for you to see it, to feel it, to grow into their ability to receive it and heal, step into, grow into their fullness, their highest potential, their true power. Shout out and gratitude to all of you holding that space for all the women & (men) to know what true love, respect, presence, safety, ease really feels like in relationship.
Imagine this new man, or maybe he's an existing man. But whoever he is, you've just spent a gorgeous day together; two friends, walking through the park, having one of those rare moments where you intended to be there for 30mins, only to still be talking after 2hrs, to then be sharing your history and delighting at the most perfect synchronicities in each other's lives, over lunch. As you take another walk together, through a park, after lunch and he briefly stops and talks to someone who's ball just rolls past, you look over to him and have one of those moments of deep, grateful knowing, that this person is everything you've ever dreamed of and way, way more. You know through and through that this man is your next "one".....and as you yourself find yourself talking to a little girl that just ran up to you to tell you about her favourite Ice cream flavour (on the smiling insistence you see, of her mum, that's it's cool), he looks at you, silently laughing to himself, shaking his head slightly in disbelief, marvelling too at the perfection of the universe, yet absolute knowing and gratitude, that this woman before him, is everything he never knew he wanted and more, plus everything he knew well that he did. In a way that completely grounds you and brings you home into yourself (over so many of those times where a guy did this next thing and you checked up and out of yourself) he comes over, looks at you with the hugest smile, and you smile back, as he gently leans in and gently kisses your on the cheek....like you had secretly hoped that he would when you "come on universe, give me a SIGN"'d it earlier. Today is THE day.
Later, you're back at his place....or maybe it's yours....who cares, you live in the same city, but the more important thing is, you feel deeply at home at this place. This is not the first time you've been here, or have hung out with him. There's a deep trust and a knowingness of a friendship that's spanned eons .
Wether he is or he isn't, this man has all the hallmarks of a man who's been a father. He's grounded and secure within himself, he has a ginormous, gentle heart, but has that kind of lion, bear, warrior strength that a man who's had a daughter, or maybe nieces, knows well. And that you can sense in him, that he is a man who truly has your back, while standing by your side. He truly wants what's best for you. He knows what you've been through, and in knowing his deep desire is for you to come fully home into you, for you to find your own feminine lioness fierceness, as well as your heartfelt softness. And your true essence and sensuality, not the manipulative illusionary kind we once used as a countermeasure to reclaim power over the men who once took us as theirs by force and charmed you in a cloud of sexual energy of their own, designed to overwhelm your senses and have you surrender to his will, to check out of yourself in his rapture, not INTO yourself and your true, soulful, feminine sovereignty, like this man does, and then willingly, of both your own conscious choice, to choose each other. And choose to share in your love.
And this is the night where you make that choice. Every time this man approaches you, you feel so at ease, because he's literally asking for permission and feeling for it as he comes into your energy field to, this time, full embrace you. And as he does, and you reach out for him back, and as you look into each other's eyes....and giggle a little, you realise and feel that entirely. You can even see on his face and feel the discernment, as you say yes to his embracing you, you can feel him still scan the whole of you, against his inner radar to check that he too feels that to be true.
Because this kind of man doesn't get hard over little girls with broken boundaries, that he uses to sneak in, when he doesn't trust that who and what he is, is enough. If you're not 100% yes, he's just not interested and will happily line up beside you and chat even more or hop up and ask for your hand to watch a movie on the couch. He's a gentlemen and you're a lady and a gentlemen is turned on by your emphatic "fuck yes!" and you being nothing more than exactly, perfectly who you are. And a gentlemen wants you to be wholeheartedly, embodiedly empowered in the use of your "no". He's not pissed off when you use it, he's happy for you when you use it. Knowing you're growing, he's actually fucking proud.
And as you realise how damn grateful you are for how incredible this amazing, dream of a man is, you feel exactly the same. You LOVE this man more and more the more he is nothing more than his gorgeous, amazing self. You deeply want for him to be grounded in himself, for him to be and grow into his highest potential. You want for him to be so happy. And you truly want the best for each other in your individual visions for your own respective purposes and your shared ones.
It's like you've won the lottery. Seeing all this, feeling all this, don't now withhold! No games with this man! Now that you're a 1000% "yes yes fuck yes" on the inside (and your bodies screaming it too) and you look deep into his eyes, this is the man you reward with your "fuck yes, I want you!" You show him how damn blown away and how grateful you are that he's here with you, that he's chosen you, with your words, your energy, your embrace.... and then, THEN, with each other's permission, you share your love and your energy, as you feel to, as new lovers crazy about each other do. And the rest, is entirely up to you.
If any part of this resonates with you, maybe you'll go create now a version of it in your world too.....and then, one day, I look forward to reading of a whole new chapter of "me too!" The "I created something new" chapter.
Just two final questions. Is there anything you would add? What do you now have to be, to do, to be ready to receive your version of that?
Big love to you.
Nat talks about Self Expression, Heart Centred Communication and Lifestyle for Leaders.