Getting out of your Comfort Zone & into the Confidence Zone

​This week, I asked a question of my Facebook followers, funnily enough, while taking a trip i wasn't yet expecting to take up one of my own personal Mt Everests, while planning for the next one i totally was and that question was: What is one thing you can do that will help you get out of your comfort zone and take one action step towards the realisation of your life and business dreams this week? If you missed it, there was a little video that went with it that you can find on my She Lives a Life She Loves Facebook page here:

watch the She Lives a Life She Loves Facebook Video Here


​What we do instead of pushing our comfort zone
In there i talked a little about what we do instead to compensate for that awesome alive feeling we live for, but that we sadly miss out on, if we stay permanently IN our little safety known zone and resist going after the experiences in life and work our soul so craves. Now, just to further clarify what i said there, I'm not saying all of the things like sugar, stress, sex and drama are "bad". But for the ones we love, like all pleasurable things, in excess they can have an addictive quality. And in the west, many are certainly compensating dealing with a working life they DON'T love, that doesn't fill them with energy and inspiration, with sugar or other eating addictions, sexual addiction/porn addiction, stress addiction, drama addiction (eg losing whole weeks in TV shows, computer games, movies, or dare i say it, even the dramas and gossip of everyday life.) In small doses (perhaps except the live gossip), these things can be stimulating or experiences that help us learn and grow, right? But if we allow them to become an escape zone from life and the butterflies that come with the new and embracing change, and do them to excess, they can eventually have negative impacts on our health. I'm sure you've heard that for sugar, i'm sure you've heard that for stress....possibly not though that, depending on HOW you're having sex...and what neurotransmitters you're releasing and what you're doing with all that energy you're generating during those 5 straight orgasms, you can either energise yourself, or completely deplete yourself of life force. The men reading this know what i'm talking about right? The point is though, when we aren't pushing our comfort zone in life, our desire to do so and have the rush that comes with it, can come out in other, perhaps not so wellbeing supportive ways. So how do you get yourself ready to ride the waves of the new?

Put yourself in top physical condition first.
Have you checked out my 9 self care tips for taking the stress out of business and leadership check list? The things I talk about in this are activities you can do to put yourself in peak physical condition for a fulfilling work and personal life and the busy life of sustaining a business. Consequently, they literally also take your body out of the unnecessary fight/flight mode that results when we neglect our basic needs when we’re incredibly busy. So if you want to cope better with change and getting out of your comfort zone, make sure you keep doing at minimum these 9 things. 

DOWNLOAD THE 9 SELF CARE PRACTICES HERE

​Are you telling yourself "what if it doesn’t work out?" Start telling yourself "what if it does".
What if you could magically look into the future and see that it worked out perfectly and you missed the opportunity because you freaked out and decided not to do it because of {insert erroneous belief or emotion here]. Reign in the stampeding hoard of wild brumbies that is your chain of thoughts (and the resulting dust cloud of emotions) that is created when they're left to their own devices... and start training them. What if it does work? What if you are enough? What if you win? What if they say yes? But here’s the thing. To maximise the benefits of your bonding efforts, you have to dedicate time to building your relationship, your partnership with those horses you want to ride every single day, until you can lead them in the direction you want. That means consciously watching and intervening in your chain of thoughts before the thoughts lead you to having that wild-eyed, whites-showing look in your eyes. What you might want to see instead is the one with an alert expression, raised head, ears pricked in your direction, of curiosity, with a nickering welcome sound or snort of excitement that you're coming. In other words, picking thoughts that lead you to feeling curious and excited about new possibilities instead.

Put your mind at ease. Do research on the little things ahead of time
It can help the wild horse mind to feel a little more at peace and in control in the meantime though, to do a little preparation before you leap. For example, maybe its checking the travel route ahead of time, or your schedule to ensure you have extra time to be ready for that phone call or appointment. Maybe it's making time to do your homework first. Or, if you’re going to a city you’ve never been to,  google your transport options, various accommodation options, build a social media network of connections in advance, financial options. Whatever gives you peace of mind that you've got the basic survival side of things and a few preparation tick boxes covered, which then leaves you with energy and bandwidth in your consciousness to embrace with open arms the opportunity/ies you're attempting to actualise. And to get really curious in a delightful, child-like, imaginative way about what wonderful possibilities lay ahead.

Push your comfort zone in little ways first
Think of this like training at the gym to get fit. Fitness doesn't happen overnight, right? While we feel great after each workout, we know it takes time and commitment to exercising at least 3 times a week to improve your physical strength and endurance levels, right? We know that once in a blue moon doesn't cut it. Especially for those recovering from burnout, major life events, abuse or PTSD, it's the same with getting ready to spend more time back out of your comfort zone.  What you can do is start doing at least one thing every day that puts you out of your comfort zone in a smaller way, before you jump in the big way. Maybe it’s doing a new hobby, or sport or type of dancing that's unfamiliar, maybe it’s calling up some organisation you haven’t before but have always wanted to, maybe it’s publicly doing a video, blogging about some topic that scares you but you're not sure if you're "expert" enough to pull it off, telling someone how you really feel, maybe it’s going something outdoorsy you haven’t done in a decade that you just want to know if you can still do it, maybe its facing up to feedback or going and asking someone out and getting rejected just to see what it feels like. Whatever it is for you, make sure it’s outside your comfort zone, so you can get yourself used to and liking these little hits, health hits of adrenaline that excite and make you feel alive when you push your comfort zone.

Do a little trust meditation.
Me being the Energetic Health/ Neo-Shamanic Transformational artist that i am, i could tell you as well, there's also a lovely, simple way also of embodying the exact qualities of more time spent in the soul zone and less in the comfort zone. E.g. trust in self and ones own inner knowing, trust in others and trust that the universe is happening for your benefit at all times. Here's a super simple trust visualisation you can do too to help you BE the change and the experience you wish to see in the world.

And after all that, who says you have to leap alone? Why not bring a friend? Or engage a friend, a partner or colleague, who will help you be accountable to your follow through?
Whatever way you choose to leap this week, here's wishing you a wonderful, magical, exciting and fulfilling ride.