Hey there. Seeing as we haven't had a video for a while, this week i thought i'd do one. This week, we're talking about self-empowerment v's surrendering to support. Why are you both really important for women particularly in the start-up phase of business?
Firstly, what is self empowerment all about? To me, it's both operating from your own inner authority (intuition), trusting and having confidence in that you have within you what you need to lead and learning to be your own, self-managed CEO. In your own business, now you have to be the one making all the decisions, taking all the responsibility for what will and what has been delivered, relative to your vision, having the final say on what you need, from you and by when. Not to mention, you're now the public face for yourself and your mission in the face of both support and opposition. Self-empowerment is essential for all women in business for your success. It's learning how to turn the worker bee mindset and all our fears of stepping up and being seen into self belief, self confidence, inspired action, success and fulfillment.
It's also about becoming resilient in the management of your own emotions, energy and internal state in general, to be able to have room and bandwidth within you to be able to manifest abundance and energy to be of service to more people and grow ongoingly in your vision and your business.
It doesn't mean you have to go the whole journey alone and it all yourself. Everything in life is easier when we feel into when we need support and allow ourselves to receive it.
Plus the expansion of your vision will inevitably involve collaboration and co-creation with others, who's abilities are complimentary to your own.
But it does mean cultivating a place within yourself where you're making life choices from a place of "I can" and from "anything is possible", as opposed to making choices from fear or self doubt or lack or soley from a risk management standpoint. The former focus has a way of taking you off track from your life purpose and expanding possibilities, whereas the latter more soul aligned focus on possibilities allows us room to do and create many incredible things and quickly.
It's not to me though, about separation or continuing the perpetuation of the "I have to do it all and there's no one else who can help."
The light and the flipside of self empowerment
I've heard it said that the exact same set of skills that help a woman thrive in becoming independent in managing her business are counterproductive to her thriving in relationship. And I have heard this same thing come out of my mouth numerous times talking to independent business women who started dating. "Make sure you also make some room to receive and surrender to all that person wants to give to you, as well as all you have to give back. " As a basic requirement of human relationships in general, we need to become as good at receiving as we are giving.
What often gets in the way of that is the shadow side of the independent superwoman archetype (and the superman for that matter). The beautiful part that wants the approval of and gets stuck in trying to prove to important parties like parents or partners or bosses how awesome we are at doing it all and thinks it's a failure or fears that we might not be met or what we'll lose if we admit we need help or show our vulnerability. Which is a fair concern, sometimes we might lose things or things might change for us admitting it. BUT, it's just as true that we might just receive the exact love and support we need if we be real and surrender to inner guidance on what direction to take and what support we need, when. Plus, our business or any company can grow via more support being brought on or better distribution and delegation of tasks once we stop trying to do it all and admit that we need help. Not to mention, when we be real, we give other's permission to be human and better love and take care of themselves too.
Repeat after me: "Self-empowered Superwomen and Supermen are super good at surrendering to support"
I'm happy to admit I've struggled with all of those in my own business journey and relating journeys enough times, and had thousands of conversations with women business owners enough times to know that we women need self empowerment, just as much as we need surrender. Both, in their different ways, aid different aspects of our success, in different aspects of our life. Really, it's a human thing, not just a girl thing :-)
If you'd like to connect with a group of women wellness and social enterprise business owners who are as committed to supporting each other in our business and making a difference endeavours as thriving in our personal lives and relationships of all kinds, come and join us in the Women in Leadership Connection Self-Empowerment Support Community.
Until next time, have fun, take care xx
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