Have read a couple of really great articles and posts this last few days about female body image and self esteem which got me thinking and responding.
One was a blog with the video post with the female student who recorded numerous other students reactions when she authentically told them that she wanted to film them because she was making a film about things she thought were beautiful in life and she thought they were beautiful. Which was heartwarmingly authentic, and interesting to observe how different people received or rejected an externally offered and heart felt compliment focused soley on them.
Then I had read another brilliant article which highlighted the potentially highly damaging impacts of introducing comparison into the female self esteem and body image mix and I would say body image full stop equation.
One of the things I believe is so core to living a life you love is committing to being self loving by building a healthy, empowering concept of self, internal and external. Of all the awesome qualities and abilities one has, of positive body image and the big unspoken (but not in the world I've come from) of sexuality. Our sexual self esteem is actually a key part of this too.
At the simplest level, there are essentially 2 ways to build all types of self esteem- the way that is based entirely on witnessing ourselves exactly as we are or as others see as wholey in this present moment. Which I am a massive advocate of. Or the way in which we derive it by comparing ourselves to others or being compared to others.
The first way leads to us feeling incredible period. The second way can lead to us feeling great if we happen to be in the better, more attractive, valuable perceived of the points being compared. But if you happen to be the person on the lesser "perceived value/attractiveness" in the pair equation, how does that feel to be on the receiving end of? We've all been there, right? Not so great.
My question to you is, do you want to be a part of a paradigm which builds you up by knocking others down? Or would you prefer to be part of a paradigm that is positivity and strength based, that sees your uniqueness for its own merits? In which you understand how damn freaking amazing you are on your own merits? And in which we are all inherently conditioned instead to behold ourselves and each person around us for their unique AMAZINGNESS? When we focus on seeing and experiencing the uniqueness of each beautiful soul, and let go of the concept of lack (of love, of money, of enough clients, likes, available partners, friends, of being enough etc) there is no longer a need to compete. Because then we are enough. And if we can trust in the natural order of life, then we understand that the "right thing" is always on the way to us and we will have enough.
So what are some ways that we can build our self esteem in all its forms without comparing ourselves to others, or degrading others, or basing it on quantifiable data in order to build up a concept that we are enough? What of those practices can we do for ourselves? And what of those can we teach to our clients?
Imagining loving, being loved and loving ourselves in that way.
Women and men, if that's what you want, it's time to speak up. Own what you want, share how you want to be loved and supported. If we want the world to change, the time has come to band together and create it.
Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.